vuls:

prepare for high school then prepare for college then prepare for your career then prepare for retirement then you’re dead 

scoregasm:

crystal-shines:

What a delightful sleeping bag

If someone broke into your tent trying to murder you you could just scare them off as a bear.

grimsdark:

The next time a guy complains about being friendzoned, send him this picture.

heteroh:

when your parents threaten to take your allowance away

image

billy-pilgrims:

[writes paper] this doesnt make any sense [prints it] [doesn’t proofread] [hands it in for a grade]

unclefather:

my ex got mad on facebook when he found out i was seeing someone else and he wrote “i hope he likes your loose pussy” so i commented back and wrote “my vagina is a muscle that will go back to the same size after sex. your penis will never get any bigger.” and now he is messaging me saying “delete that comment now”

©heydestiel